The Daily Knight #25 – Like Mama June After Hot Yoga

March 1, 2016

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Deconstructing Deadpool, the 88th Academy Awards, Star Wars News

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This is The Daily Knight for Tuesday, March 1, 2016. The Daily Knight supports Making Biscuits Cat Rescue, a 501c3 charity. If you like this podcast, please consider making a donation or adopting a rescue cat at makingbiscuits.org. I’m your host, Gerardo San Diego, and I’ll be talking about Deadpool, the Oscars and some Star Wars news….

But First

My Dad had to have surgery to fix his aorta
The Academy Awards
- Spotlight wins best movie
- Mark Rylance wins best supporting actor
- Mad Max Fury Road beats Star Wars
- Droids take the stage
Star Wars digital on iTunes March 15, on Blu-Ray April 5
Star Wars Episode VIII to continue immediately after Episode VII

Deadpool

Opening credits
Taxi cab with Dopinder
Bridge fight scene
Colossus and Negasonic
Flashback #1
- Wade Wilson and pizza guy
- Wade meets Vanessa at bar
- Wade is diagnosed with cancer
Back at bridge, Ajax gets away, Deadpool does Monty Python black knight impression with broken hands and foot, cuts off own hand and jumps on dumptruck
Flashback #2
- Wade goes for extreme cancer treatment
- Wade fights Ajax, loses, treatment facility burns down and Wade emerges from ashes
- Wade follows Vanessa, then talks to Weasel
- Deadpool is born, costume takes shape
- Wade meets blind woman Al (“I shouldn’t have quit crack.”)
Deadpool goes back to blind Al’s place, IKEA dialogue, small hand (“It’s gonna feel HUGE in this hand…”)
At strip joint, Stan Lee is DJ, Ajax and Angel kidnap Vanessa
Deadpool gets lots of guns from Weasel and Blind Al (“No, no, down, down!”) then gets Colossus and Negasonic and ride Dopinder’s cab to boneyard
Big fight at boneyard, Deadpool spells out “F-R-A-N-C-i-S” using mercenaries, Deadpool fights Ajax, Colossus and Negasonic fight Angel Dust, cartoons dance around during Toto montage
Deadpool beats Ajax, Colossus speech, Deadpool shoots Ajax, Colossus throws up, Vanessa takes Deadpool mask off, Hugh Jackman mask
Ferris Bueller post-credits scene

Deadpool Quotes that made me giggle

“Like Mama June after hot yoga.”
“House blowing up builds character.”
“Happy Lent.”
“Dad?”
“This is my most prized possession…”
“All the dinosaurs feared the T-Rex.”
“McAvoy or Stewart? These timelines are confusing.”
“That’s right! You’re about to be killed by a zamboni! You’re going to die… in five minutes”
“I bet it feels huge in this hand.”
“Listen Al, if I never see you again, I want you to know that I love you very much. I also buried 1,600 kilos of cocaine somewhere in the apartment – right next to the cure for blindness. Good luck.”
“It’s a Big house. It’s weird I only ever see two of you. Almost like the studio couldn’t afford another X-Man.”
“Superhero landing! She’s going to do a superhero landing!”
“You’re still here? It’s over. Go home! Oh, you’re expecting a teaser for Deadpool 2. Well, we don’t have that kind of money. What are you expecting? Sam Jackson showing up in an eyepatch and a saucy little leather number? Go!”
“Whose balls did I have to fondle to get my very own movie”? I can’t tell you his name, but it rhymes with ‘pullverine.’
“You look like Freddy Krueger face-fucked a topographical map of Utah.”
“That guy was up there before I got here.”
“Listen Al, if I never see you again, I want you to know that I love you very much. I also buried 1,600 kilos of cocaine somewhere in the apartment – right next to the cure for blindness. Good luck.”
“Looks ARE everything! Ever heard Dave Beckham speak? It’s like he mouth-sexed a can of helium. You think Ryan Reynolds got this far on a superior acting method?”
“That’s the shit emoji. You know the turd with the smiling face and the eyes. I thought it was chocolate yogurt for so long…”
“How can I help you? Besides luring children into a panel van.”
Deadpool: How’s the Kullen coming along? Ikea doesn’t assemble itself, you know.
Blind Al: You’re telling me. I don’t mind the Kullen. It’s an improvement on the Hurdal.
Deadpool: Please. Anything’s an improvement over the Hurdal. I’d have taken a Hemnes or a Trysil over a Hurdal.
[sighs]
Deadpool: No, I didn’t get excited until I saw the Kullen.
Blind Al: Screw, please.
Deadpool: Here? Now? Just kidding. I know it’s been decades.
Blind Al: You’d be surprised.
Deadpool: Pretty grossed out.
Four or five moments – that’s all it takes to become a hero. Everyone thinks it’s a full-time job. Wake up a hero. Brush your teeth a hero. Go to work a hero. Not true. Over a lifetime there are only four or five moments that really matter. Moments when you’re offered a choice to make a sacrifice, conquer a flaw, save a friend – spare an enemy. In these moments everything else falls away…

The Daily Knight #25 – Like Mama June After Hot Yoga

March 1, 2016

But First

Deadpool

Deadpool Quotes that made me giggle

Other Deadpool Quotes links

Donate

Geeky T-shirts etc. at GeekSwag.me

Credits